Motherhood: Not for the Faint of Heart.

If you hadn't noticed lately ... all my posts seem to be about my babies.  Or trips/visitors.

Hope you don't mind.

It's just that ... that's all I do these days.

My world has not yet become organized enough to add much else.  I'm getting there, however.

When Belen first arrived, all ticked that she had to leave Heaven (as Mark put it), my life became a constant battle between two settings:  fast forward, and pause.

Pause:  Belle needs you.  Hold her.  Rock her.  Talk to her.  Give her your finger.  Feed her again.  Bounce, bounce, bounce on that ball!  Then fast forward!  She's asleep!  Get those dishes put away, fold that laundry ... Mark's coming home and he's stressed and frustrated by this loooooong job search!  Now pause ... Mac's awake.  Play with him.  Kiss him.  Make a snack together.  Sing a song.  Hide and seek.  Build a fort.  Crap ... she's up again.  Fast!  Feed her, hold her, get dinner going!  Give Mac that ipod, keep him from knocking over that playpen or stealing her swing.  Now pause again ... Mark's home ... love on him.  Make sure the kids are as happy as possible, the home feels like somewhere you actually want to be ...

Pretty sure I could go on and on. 

There were several days I felt like I was teetering on the edge of insanity, but then I would generally get a little mad.  What kind of wimp am I?  Two kids?  I can't handle two kids?  Pull it together!  Even people who don't want kids have two kids.  Pssshh.

And so, I see myself becoming a little bit better.  Mostly.  Some days, I decide I am the laziest mom around.  But other days, I think, "Bring it on, world!  I will have happy kids, a happy husband, a clean(ish) house, and good food!  My family will be awesome." 

I like those days.

And they're happening more frequently.